Fail: To fall short of success or achievement in something expected, attempted, desired or approved.

To fail is to be filled with a sense of gut-wrenching dread. It's feeling like you have an arrow following you. Hey look, this girl/guy failed. I've failed; exams, relationships, driving tests and more. And yes failure can be incredibly painful. I used to think failure meant universal negativity and finality. That is, until I stumbled upon Elizabeth Day and her magic.

Her podcast, 'How To Fail' got me through a trying situation last year that felt like, well, a setback. And I guess to some extent it was but at the time it made me realise that I could embrace that failure instead. It makes me think of this JK Rowling quote: "Some failure in life is inevitable. It is impossible to live in life without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all-in which case, you fail by default." 

Hearing people I respect and admire, like Dolly Alderton or Phoebe Waller-Bridge, successful women in their creative fields, openly discussing their successes and setbacks it's eye-opening. Not to mention, reassuring and inspiring. As I write this post, I am listening to Charly Cox's episode and it is equally as inspiring, especially when I have just started to get into writing my own poetry myself. Y'know, failure isn't something we talk about openly but this podcast turns the notion that it should be kept private and not be up for discussion on its head. Difficult conversations demand to be had.

The book, follows in a similar fashion though it delves more extensively into Elizabeth Day's experiences and stories. She covers how to fail at dating, being Gwyneth Paltrow, friendship, work, families and more. It also ties her experiences in with that of her podcast guests and is like a cosy, reassuring, calming blanket of a book. Crammed with wisdom and humour and charm, it's such a brilliant read. 

I'll be honest, I found How To Fail a bit too real at times which is in no way a critique of the book itself. It just meant I read it a bit slower and more cautiously than usual. That being said, it is in the realness and openness of Day and her contributors that solace and relatability lie. This is such a beautiful book and if I was Oprah-level rich, I'd give everyone in my life a copy. So go read it, or listen to the audiobook-also narrated by Day. Oh and side note, Phoebe Waller-Bridge descending the stairs singing 'At Last x Etta James', big mood. 

-Have you read How To Fail? What did you think of it?

Winter certainly seems to be almost on the backburner here in Auckland. While I love donning coats and any excuse for multiple blankets, I will not miss the cold. Winter isn't all bleak and this season, I've found a bunch of new favourite things. From stationery to fashion, podcasts and writing...

High As Hope: I couldn't not mention this album, Florence and the Machine's fourth. I feel like fourth albums seem to generate a varied response from fans. High As Hope easily feels like Florence's most candid yet. Every song is well considered yet intimate. My favourite, favourite track is still Patricia, written for Patti Smith. It gets me every time. I also love 100 Years and South London Forever but the whole album is a beaut. It's barely left my car stereo, yes I am that level of old school, since its release at the end of June. 

Olivia Laing's Writing: The Lonely City has sat on my shelves for a while, I remember trying to read it years ago and I don't know if I just wasn't patient or appreciative enough but I couldn't get into it. Flash forward a couple of years and I love her work. So far I've finished Crudo, her novel set in 2017 that naturally feels incredibly real yet personal at the same time. I've been thinking how best to articulate why I love Laing's words so much, wish me luck here. I feel like as well as writing incredibly personally, she also has a universality to her words as well. I don't mean that in a, cult book you'll see everyone reading almost ironically on public transport. What I mean is those who do choose to read her work will more than likely notice some glimmers of resonance among the pages. I'm still slowly making my way through The Lonely City and it's more than likely going to come away with me on my travels soon. I also have The Trip To Echo Spring sitting on my shelves as well. 

How To Fail w/ Elizabeth Day: Whenever anyone catches me listening to this podcast they usually give me questioning glances and want to know why. My response usually is to read the description and then realise I am not indulging in a series of bleak listening sessions. How to Fail essentially explores what hasn't gone right for people and how that in turn is cause for celebration and a chance to succeed better. My favourite episodes so far have been with Dolly Alderton, Olivia Laing and Phoebe Waller-Bridge but I highly recommend giving this a listen. 

The navy Moleskine: To know me is to know Moleskines are probably my all-time favourite notebooks. I have been using them for years, ever since discovering I could use my student discount to buy them cheaply from an art supply store here in Auckland. They were my tutorial notebook of choice, travel diaries, to-do style notebooks, heck I even used to use one way back to write out blog posts by hand first. It's only in the last year really that I have started using them again and I recently treated myself to one of their softcover, leather navy gems. My only gripe is NZ isn't the best place to find the variety of colours, styles etc so I am hoping I find some newbies when I am in Melbourne.

father rabbit's card selection: Ok so I rarely venture to the Jervois Rd side of Auckland, which is probably a good thing because I'd buy all the cards from Father Rabbit. So many gems guys! Their in-house range of floral illustrations is beautiful, but they are also home to Hotel Magique. The latter, a brand Liv bought to my attention. They also have gorgeous tags, wrapping paper and beautifully selected gifts. Well worth a visit pre or post-brunching from Dear Jervois. I highly recommend the smashed avo with smoked salmon. Such a good time. 

Loafers: Hi, my name is Sophie and I have this thing with loafers. I blame Alexa Chung for this. Yeah it's naturally all her fault. Ahem, I also blame Gucci for the revival and sudden reappearance of these classic, comfortable, stunning shoes. Anyway, these have been my Winter shoes of choice and I love them. Do I want more? Absolutely. Do I need to get out of my shoe comfort zone? Absolutely. Will I? Stay tuned...

-What have you been loving this Winter?